MEKTUP:<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n
Yine Seni d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmekteyim, yar\u0131m as\u0131rd\u0131r d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm yetmedi. Nas\u0131l yetsin ki? Sen, benim i\u00e7in bunca veri\u015ften hi\u00e7 geri durmad\u0131n. Ben ise acaba bunlar\u0131n art arda gelmesinin bollu\u011fu kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda, \u015f\u00fckr\u00fcm\u00fc ifade edemeden ka\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131klar\u0131m \u00e7ok mu, diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmekteyim. Sevginden eminim. Vaadlerinden hi\u00e7 \u015f\u00fcphe duymad\u0131m. Ama hi\u00e7bir \u015fey yapamaman\u0131n yorgunlu\u011fu ve utanc\u0131 i\u00e7indeyim.<\/p>\n
\u015eimdi bahara haz\u0131rlanan \u00fclkemde, bahar\u0131 haz\u0131rlayana binlerce sel\u00e2m olsun, diyorum. Kelimelerim yetersiz kal\u0131yor. \u0130\u00e7imdeki bahar m\u0131, yoksa d\u0131\u015f\u0131mdaki mi, sevin\u00e7 sebebim. Hani bir g\u00fcn k\u0131\u015f ayaz\u0131nda bahar\u0131 ya\u015fatm\u0131\u015ft\u0131n ya, hani ku\u015flar\u0131 pencereme m\u00fcjde i\u00e7in yollam\u0131\u015f, binlerce g\u00fczel eserinin arkas\u0131nda saklanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131n ya, i\u015fte o g\u00fcn vefan\u0131 bildirdin. Bildi\u011fim en kesin bilgilerden biri, asla vefana ula\u015f\u0131lamaz oldu\u011fudur.<\/p>\n
Seni \u00f6vemem, nas\u0131l \u00f6vece\u011fimi bilemiyorum. Belki, \u00f6\u011fretirsen olur. Seni anlatamam, nas\u0131l anlatay\u0131m ki? Seni, Senin beni sevdi\u011fin gibi sevemem, zira sevgide Teksin. \u0130\u00e7imi dolduruyorken, d\u0131\u015f\u0131ma vuramay\u0131\u015f\u0131m, yetersizli\u011fim sebebiyledir.<\/p>\n
Yaratt\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum, kayboluyorum. Bu nas\u0131l bir Kudret? \u015ean\u0131ndan m\u0131, yoksa muhabbetinin co\u015fkusundan m\u0131, bunca bol l\u00fbtuf, do\u011frusu merak ediyorum. \u0130nsan ne kadar kudretlense, ne kadar kemal sahibi olsa, ne kadar b\u00fcy\u00fcse, ne kadar ilimlense acziyetinden \u00f6teye gidi\u015f yok. Nas\u0131l b\u00f6yle kudretlisin? Kemalde dengin yok, ululu\u011fun gururu ve kibri yok eder. \u0130lminin ise s\u0131n\u0131r\u0131 yok. Biz ise Senden gelenler olarak, kendimiz bir \u015fey olamay\u0131p, ancak Seninle s\u00f6z edilmeye de\u011fer oluyoruz. Bize biraz yans\u0131man bizi, muhatap k\u0131l\u0131yor. \u0130simlerini ezberledim, g\u00fczel bir naz\u0131m oldu. Hakikatine ula\u015fmak ve isimlerinle isimlenmek bile, adeta eri\u015filmez. S\u0131fatlar\u0131n ise, \u00c2zametinden bir \u00f6zet. Hangi birini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcneyim diye \u00f6m\u00fcr eritmedeyim. Her hangi birinin s\u0131n\u0131fland\u0131rmas\u0131na bile yeti\u015femeyecek acizlik i\u00e7indeyim.<\/p>\n
Kul eliyle yap\u0131lan eserlere bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131mda, yine Senin \u015eaheserlerini g\u00f6r\u00fcyorum. Yere basan ayaklar\u0131m, topra\u011f\u0131n yumu\u015fakl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 hissederken, g\u00f6\u011fe uzanan kollar\u0131m y\u0131ld\u0131zlar\u0131n\u0131 kucakl\u0131yor. Ben yald\u0131zlara de\u011fil, y\u0131ld\u0131zlar\u0131na hayran\u0131m. Ben sedef kakmalara de\u011fil, inci, mercan\u0131na hayran\u0131m. Ben eserlere de\u011fil, \u015faheserlerine hayran\u0131m. Bulutuna, ya\u011fmuruna, denizine, yosun kokuna hayran\u0131m. \u00c7e\u015fitli ve her boydan a\u011fac\u0131na, orman\u0131na, topra\u011f\u0131na hayran\u0131m. B\u00fct\u00fcn bunlar\u0131n bereketine, emre itaatine hayran\u0131m.<\/p>\n
Seni g\u00fcnde yirmi be\u015f saat d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnebiliyorum. A\u011f\u0131r bir i\u015f\u00e7i gibi, uyurken, uyan\u0131kken, hep Seni d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmedeyim. D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerime d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceler eklenerek b\u00fcy\u00fcrken, acizli\u011fime acizli\u011fim eklenerek, k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fclmekteyim. \u015eimdi ben, kulca bir dilekte bulunuyorum. Sen nas\u0131lsa Ulusun. Benim dile\u011fim Senden bir \u015fey eksiltmez. Merhametin ise, benimki ile mukayese bile edilmez. Ne olur, bizi, g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcn de\u011fdikleri ile birlikte, Ar\u015f\u0131nda sevdiklerin olarak, bar\u0131nd\u0131r. Ya, Erhamer Rahimin! Ya, Sahib-\u00fcl Ar\u015f\u2019il Azim!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
MEKTUP: Yine Seni d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmekteyim, yar\u0131m as\u0131rd\u0131r d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm yetmedi. Nas\u0131l yetsin ki? Sen, benim i\u00e7in bunca veri\u015ften hi\u00e7 geri durmad\u0131n. Ben ise acaba bunlar\u0131n art arda gelmesinin bollu\u011fu kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda, \u015f\u00fckr\u00fcm\u00fc ifade edemeden ka\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131klar\u0131m \u00e7ok mu, diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmekteyim. Sevginden eminim. Vaadlerinden hi\u00e7 \u015f\u00fcphe duymad\u0131m. Ama hi\u00e7bir \u015fey yapamaman\u0131n yorgunlu\u011fu ve utanc\u0131 i\u00e7indeyim. \u015eimdi bahara haz\u0131rlanan \u00fclkemde, bahar\u0131 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[158],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-494","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-3-06-mektup-tefekkur"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/aysegulerdog.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/494","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/aysegulerdog.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/aysegulerdog.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/aysegulerdog.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/aysegulerdog.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=494"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/aysegulerdog.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/494\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":495,"href":"https:\/\/aysegulerdog.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/494\/revisions\/495"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/aysegulerdog.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=494"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/aysegulerdog.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=494"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/aysegulerdog.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=494"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}